Cat

A cat spoke to me today…

A. CAT. SPOKE. TO. ME. TODAY!

I was busy doing… whatever it is I was doing when he came and inserted himself right on the center of my attention, as only a cat can do, and he said:

“Forgive me human, since I realize you are terribly busy, I’m going to try and make this as long as possible”

I looked at him and all I could blurt out was “You are talking to me”

To which he replied “Apparently, nothing escapes you today… I was simply wondering, what is it with you humans and your inability to simplify the trans-personal interactions which are complex enough to begin with, with the catastrophic result of an overwhelming feeling of loss and loneliness, wouldn’t it be far much more comfortable to transcend the limits of your own fears and create true connections among your kind?”

I looked at him and all I could blurt was “What in the world are you talking about?”

To which he replied “In the interest of not making this terribly boring for me, perhaps you should let me do more of the talking and you do more of the listening, it is not often that a cat decides to confide in a human a piece of his wisdom, so my first advice to you would be… to stay quiet.

You humans… are always looking at the wrong place. Allow me to explain: In the mornings you look for your car keys on your desk, when it is obvious that you should be looking underneath me. In the evenings you look for you underwear in your dresser drawer when it is clear that I just pissed on it over in that corner.

But beyond the mundane examples this behaviour turns chronic. You look up into a world of false hopes and dreams when you should be looking down at your feet so you don’t stumble, you look left when you cross the street and never see the pretty girl standing to your right.

But the worst case of this extremely annoying syndrome is when you look outside trying to find the very things that will define your happiness, your love, your connection with other fellow beings, and with your god, or your karma, or whatever it is you believe in. You see my dear human… you should be looking inside yourself.”

The cat proceeded to lick his paws briefly and then he continued.

“It has occurred to me, that maybe you need to take more naps. For that way, maybe, just maybe, you would be able to quiet your thoughts long enough to finally reach the place inside you where all the answers reside, and maybe, just maybe you would be able to realize that you are not a slave of the events of your life, but that those very events, are nothing but choices you have made. And when you reach that realization, you will finally be free to choose.

You will be free to choose to work, to love, to hate. And when you do, you will be looking in the right direction, so when you work, you wont be thinking of taking a break, and when you take a break, you won’t be feeling guilty you’re not working, and when you love, you will not fear the loss or the hurt.

And when you live, you will not dread over death. And when the end of your days on this planet finally comes, you will not look back on your life and say -Oh shit… that was a mess.”

And with that, the cat proceeded to flick his tail at me and walked over to the corner where my pissed on underwear still lay, and he curled up and got ready to take a nap in which he would uncover another truth that I will never know. And at the last moment I asked him.

“Do you have any other advice for me?”

“Only one other… do not meddle in the affairs of cats, for we are subtle… and will take a shit on your keyboard”